I’m trying to process through this one, I really am. I understand that most laws start for a reason. That somewhere there is a grain in them of why they had to be made. That doesn’t make me think what I encountered today is any less ridiculous.
Let me start by saying that some of this comes from my own detrimental pride. I know that. I hate that I have to have financial help in things for Aubree. I got off of WIC as soon as I could because of the stigma that I hold for it. So the fact that I’m still having to have help with her daycare weighs heavily on me.
Today I had to go sign some paperwork for her recertification, when I should have been home sleeping. I got sent home from work because apparently I didn’t look too good. I did get to crochet this morning and take a nap, but then I spent the rest of the afternoon trying to take care of paperwork, because where my daughter is concerned, I don’t mess around. Well I got there and they told me that they’d only qualified me for three months because now I was divorced and I had to go apply for child support. Well I had given them my divorce decree and I said that none was ordered. “Well we can’t go by the court order.” I’m sorry… WHAT?! You can’t go by a court order… I seriously thought they were joking. Nope, I have to go apply for child support. So I tried to call the attorney general’s office. That was impossible. They had about 500,000 menus you have to go through and no option to hit zero for a receptionist. Ridiculous. So I go in and tell them the story and they said that I’d have to apply but most likely they would open a case and then immediately close it. Does that not seem like… I don’t know, a waste of time and money?? It’s a waste of MY time that now I’m going to have to go BACK to CCS which pisses me off anyway! Fine… whatever, I’ll do your stupid paperwork. It just goes back to my issue about so many laws being cookie cutter type deals.
That is not really my issue. (How did you already know that!!) My real issue is why does everyone expect that Andrew will all the sudden just be super happy to pay for Aubree. He didn’t pay for anything while we were married, he couldn’t even hold a job. He couldn’t stay in school, all he wanted to do was play video games. He didn’t even care about me then. Then we we FINALLY got divorced he tried to demand that I would have to pay to support him. So obviously he doesn’t care about Aubree still since he’d be taking what money I do have. Why would anyone in their right mind thing that he would pay for her now!! He wouldn’t because he doesn’t care about anyone but himself.
I don’t need child support from him. I can support us. I’ll ask for the help I need to get Aubree what she needs even if it does hurt my pride because the simple fact of the matter is, she’s more important than my damned pride. She’s more important than ANYTHING, and since she was born, I have been the one supporting her and making sure she had everything she needed and I’ll be damned if I’m gonna someone who doesn’t even care horn in. I’ll do what you want, Texas, but I’m probably going to yell about it a little.
On the bright side, I get to hang out with Aubree tonight and she helped me crochet, and she’s been in a really good mood and we have cuddled a lot. The things I have to be thankful for have not escaped me. They just make me more motivated to be basically the best mom ever.